Do ‘it’ for Denmark

Kan sex redde Danmarks fremtid? That is, can sex save Denmark’s future?

According to government statistics, Denmark posted a birth rate of 10 per 1,000 residents in 2013 — its lowest in decades. The nation’s birthrate was  9.9 in 1983.

Denmark’s perennially low birth rate places it with Germany (8.33), Japan (8.39) and Singapore (7.72). And the downward trend has left people worried in Denmark. Most couples say they want two or three kids, according to the Copenhagen Post, but one in five couples wind up childless.

To counter this trend, a bold and hilarious campaign has emerged. For the salvation of the country, a Danish travel company called Spies has organized the movement Do it for Denmark!; it wants Danes to act and act now — without precautions.

“This is Denmark. We are Danes. We keep our distance. We do not pick a seat close to strangers if other seats are available. We do not talk to strangers in the trains.”
― Steen Langstrup, Metro

Studies show that Danes have 46 percent more sex on holiday, and because more sex increases the chances for more children, the travel company Spies has called for a romantic break to save the future of Denmark.

To get the campaign of the ground, Spies will give prizes to couples who get pregnant while on vacations purchased through them.

Afterwards, upon successful sex, the couple is to shoot off a positive pregnancy test and medical records to the company. Then they may win three years worth of free diapers.

Börn er vis sorg, men uvis gläede.
― Children are definitive sorrow, but undefinitive joy.

And just in case Danes are confused by this whole pregnancy thing, the company has offered a helpful how-to on its website:

  • Men, avoid tight pants. Even if you think they look good on you.
  • Remember to exercise and maintain a healthy body weight.
  • Avoid stress. Take a massage or try some yoga.
  • Use Gravity. Lay down after sex for at least 15 minutes.
  • Don’t forget to have sex – without using protection.

4 thoughts on “Do ‘it’ for Denmark

  1. At a point in the history of Earth, when Humankind has been so successful that it is outgrowing its ability to sustain itself without significant population control, the Danes are to be commended.

    I’m fathered children, and my life would have been far poorer without them, but their children may face a far more bleak future. At some point, universally, the trend must be reversed.

    Not to sound pessimistic, but a long, hard look is in order as to how economically-tied societies are to an increasing birthrate and the markets that it creates.

  2. Emancipation of women is the first step.” – and I would never dispute that.

    I had always thought that the belief in the inferiority of women was largely aa Middle-Eastern concept, arising from the Bible, but one would be amazed at the beliefs of early Iron Age Grecian physicians and philosophers who presumed women to be anatomically inferior to men, that, for one example, their skins were more porous, which exposed them to more maladies, including invasion by evil spirits (daemons) – they also believed that wombs traveled around in the body, and could sap energy from other vital organs. I had no real idea how far we actually had to go.

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